Saturday, March 28, 2009

I'll Figure It Out


"Boat rocking
Trouble maker
Non-conforming
Shit starter
With the rebel DNA
Pirate spirit
Headache


It took me all my life
to finally figure out
that I'm not in the mood
to be anything like you."


      --- Lisa Marie Presley


Used to be the story of my life.

This evening is one of those nights....home alone, restless, a little troubled, windy outside and a storm blowing in, full bottle of wine... well minus one glass and probably going to be empty before the night is over. My mood is cynical... and as broody as the weather... broody enough to be pulling out the cigarettes except that I promised the Captain I wouldn't do that anymore. Haven't had one since September.


"And maybe it's alright
And maybe not
I'll conduct my choir
I'll figure it out."


7 comments:

smartass sob said...

Let the cigarettes alone Ms.Chatelaine. I can tell you from experience that you can not smoke just one and then stop. The more you smoke, the more you will want to smoke. I can also tell you, from experience, that the more times you quit and then backslide the more difficult it is to quit the next time.

You are going through the part of quitting that nobody warns you about. The physical part of withdrawal is usually over in less than a month. It's the psychological part that gets one to backslide - usually about three months or more later, when one is undergoing some sort of emotional stress.

Here's a tip that worked for me: when you get an urge to smoke find a substitute. Use a toothpick, or half a soda straw, or even a raw carrot stick. Hold it as you would a cigarette and take long slow, deep drags off it, just as if you were smoking. Take the air deeply and slowly into your lungs and hold it. Then let it out slowly like you would those first few drags off a cigarette. The deep, slow breathing helps get rid of the stress. Try this several times - it works well enough to get you over the rough spots.

You can stop smoking. And you can stay stopped. If I can and jillions of others can, then so can you. Believe it - it's true. I've been free of those accursed things for thirteen years now after a thirtyone year habit. Good luck.

sasob

Chatelaine said...

I promise, SaSob, that for some reason, I've never gotten really addicted to smoking. I only smoked when I was pissed off and broody or something. Like about 2 or 3 cigarettes every month or so. Used to take me a year to go through one pack. Sort of like when I got pissed off at the world I would punish myself. Used to be in far worse ways than smoking, though.

My best friend has been smoking since we were in college. She quit when she got pregnant and immediately started back as soon as the baby was born. I'm trying to get her to quit for good. It's really showing in her face now, all those years of it. I'm lucky that I never got addicted to it. I guess cigs just weren't my addiction to have.

smartass sob said...

Okay, I'll just mind my own business. ;-)

sasob

Chatelaine said...

Awwww, no, I didn't mean that, SaSob :-(

smartass sob said...

I know ya didn't, but I mighta been talkin' out of turn. You're a grown woman - you know what you're doin'. I just thought you might be having a difficult time staying away from the smokes. You're lucky you aren't addicted to them and can take them or leave them; most cannot. ;-)

sasob

Anonymous said...

It's strange how you turn a corner sometimes. I had a smoke with Paul Feine, like a year ago. It don't matter anymore. Oh yeah, a half of one with Christiansen in the parking garage in LA three months ago, just to be polite. Dude, it was strong, too.

Smoked for a long time, maybe twenty years. Then one day, it just wasn't a big deal.

I do like to share a smoke with a lady now and again. Pass it back and forth like a joint. I expect there's some deeper meaning there, but WTF? :-)

Chatelaine said...

Sharing a smoke is good. I like that too :)