Having a thought....

You know, I used to be so extroverted. I used to be in sales, account management, etc. I used to network. I used to know everyone. I used to talk, talk, talk, and totally put on my game face.

Or maybe I was faking it. I don't know.

But now, I realize I'm really introverted. I'm a home body. I prefer to read a book and work on alone projects instead of group and team things. I like the quiet. If I have to be with groups, I'd rather it be a small group of 6 or 8 at the most, and I'd rather it be mostly close friends. I kind of hate small talk. I like to talk deep. I like to talk about something meaningful and serious, like politics, books, theories, etc., instead of fashion, weather, TV shows, or just "stuff".

I'm a too-intense-for-my-own-good introvert.

Lately I have thoughts about getting back into real estate. I used to be a sales assistant to a really big and important real estate developer in Memphis back in the early 90s. I took the test, had a real estate license, did open houses, and everything. I loved it. I love houses and buildings. I love decorating. I really enjoyed showing houses and offices and helping people find the home or space they needed.

I also have thoughts of running for a county supervisor position in the local government some day.

None of this goes along with being an introvert.

What has happened to me? Sometimes I think I just got tired. Really tired. Looking back on it, I realize my last position, the one I got laid off from, had been making me old for years. I see it in my good friend that still works there. She has nothing in her life but work, and it's making her old and tired.

The Captain being here will help. He never meets a stranger, and everyone around here just loves him. Having him here brings me out a bit. He gets me out and about.

I've also approached my father about going into his business with him and my brothers. I've not said anything about it on here because of my old privacy issues, but my family has one of the largest (and oldest at 60 years) furniture and home stores in the area.

I sort of see me being able to combine that with real estate on the side, a little decorating work, and eventually getting out of my shell enough to get back into knowing everyone, like I used to, and maybe running for that supervisor position several years down the line.

Whew! My mind is running away with me this morning. Must have been that fresh package of Brazilian coffee I opened.

I have an idea

I'm kind of scared to say it, though.

Ok, so you know I'm unemployed now since my job was eliminated last month after 14 years with my company, right? Right.

Well, I have an idea for a business that both the Captain and I think I'd be pretty good at doing.

Event Planner.

Wait! Before you roll your eyes, just hear me out.

There are no event planners around here. None. It's an almost totally untapped market. And I mean all kinds of events. Not just weddings, but business events, banquets, proms, parties, funerals, celebrations of all kinds....there is "nada" when it comes to assistance and coordination here. There's not even a local awareness of what types of vendors and resources are available when it comes to putting on an event. We don't even have caterers locally. Well, there's one, and she's doing our wedding reception, but I have to say, as sweet as she is, she leaves a lot to be desired. I could do SUCH a better job myself if I didn't have to concentrate on being the bride.

So, the Captain and I were having one of our fantastic dinners one night when he was here, and he said that he really liked that I enjoy living well and seem to do it so effortlessly. He said that he liked the way I did things. And you know? He's right. I don't mind if I say so myself. I am very good at making things good.

Really, I don't do anything spectacular at home, but I think that just a little extra effort really makes the evening, and I do that anywhere, all the time. A former boss of mine, way back in the early 90s when I was the personal assistant to a mega-real estate developer, said that he always liked the way I made a simple pastries and coffee meeting look as if it had been catered by The Peabody Hotel. I just like making things nice. And as for organizing, I'm kind of a fiend about it. My friends have teased me for years about organizing my pen and pencil drawer one day at the office, and I really do organize my sock and accessory drawers for fun. I'm an organizer geek. I love making lists and checking things off on them. I have lists of my lists when it comes to an event like my wedding. And I make lists for the Captain all the time. (He SO needs them ;-)

I've been coordinating things since I was in high school. I was always on the committees or the chairperson for them, and I even coordinated the talent competition for the county fair for several years. Also, back when I was an indirect sales account executive I used to plan events for nationwide retail accounts and my company when they were partners. One of my accounts used to be a nationwide electronics store. I don't want to put their name here, because it would just bring useless hits to my blog, but think of a red and black logo and neighborhood electronics stores with over 4000 locations....

In addition to those duties at my former job, I also helped to re-negotiate contracts between local authorized dealers and my company back when we merged with another corporation, and part of my role was to coordinate the meetings, make sure protocol was attended to so that no one got their toes stepped on, and to schmooze. I can be great at schmoozing when I want to be.

So, anyway, during dinner that night with the Captain, we went off on a tangent about what kind of business it would be, what services I would offer, and how it would be set up, marketed, and who the target customer would be. I don't do anything half-assed, so I would insist on a store front, something that is sort of a life style store....home decor, nice things, arrangements, set-ups, etc, so that people could see how I do things. I would have the place of business actually BE a store, so that people could purchase things and do them on their own if they want. But the main money train would be the event planning, and I might offer catering myself. The Captain and I are pretty darn good together in the kitchen.

I even have a business name in mind, but I'm not saying what it is, because it's just too perfect, and I don't want to give it away. It's has one of my favorite words in it, and would be very intriguing on a business card and building signage.

So anyway, that's my wishful idea. It's mostly just a fantasy, but sometimes I find myself thinking that it just might work, and deep down I'd love to find a way to make it so.

I'd be quite interested in your thoughts.

Yep, I'm feeling MUCH better now

He's here! The Captain got here late Wednesday night, and while I still can't believe I lost my job, I am definitely feeling a lot better. He's been completely spoiling me, making me breakfast, giving me back and shoulder rubs, and we even went shopping.

Friday was difficult. It was my last day at work, and people were calling me to tell me goodbye and express their disbelief at what had happened. I cried a lot that day.

But then after I dropped the last of my company assets off at Fed Ex for shipping back to corporate, we went shopping, and I got the cutest pair of plaid wedge heel sandals. They're ridiculously high heels, but I love them, and shoe shopping is the best thing for losing a job.

The Captain got himself some new Nike Airs too.

And he's been so busy around here. In addition to taking care of me, he cleaned the dead leaves out the azaleas so they could be fertilized for the spring, fixed the light on the terrace, put up a hummingbird feeder outside my kitchen window, and a bluebird house, and he even put up a new light-blocking roller shade in the bedroom, and a window blind in the office.

Oh! AND!...He made me Belgian waffles for breakfast. I have a man that can fix things AND cook. How cool is that! :-)

Today we're going over to Grand Harbor Marina on the Tennessee River to see if it might be a good place for a sailboat. We've started thinking we want something nearby, that we can go to every weekend if we want. Also, my best friend and her husband have a cabin over there, where we've done some great football parties in the past. Airfare has gone crazy expensive, and who knows what kind of inflation is coming down the road with this current government we've got, so we're not thinking that going back and forth to Washington for sailing is very realistic.

So yep, I'm feeling much better. Lots of fun things going on. I still can't believe I don't have a job though. It's weird that I can just take off on a Monday and scout for sailing locations without worrying about internet meetings, conference calls, and email. I don't think it's totally sunk in yet.

Tired

    I still don't feel very good, but I'm tired of feeling tired, so I'm making myself get up and get out.

So here's the deal on my job. My last day is this Friday, March 13th. I told my director I'd like to leave now, rather than fake it for the rest of the month. Screw 'em. I'll get 8 weeks pay as a base severance package, then two weeks pay for every year I've been there, and that will take me through November. I get to keep my insurance benefits too. I don't know how they call that cutting costs, since the only thing they are really not going to have is my actual work contribution, but whatever. I'm trying to forget about it. So for now I'm not going to do anything. I'm just going to coast and plan my wedding for a few months.

I don't really have any work to do this week, other than packing up my computers, training equipment, etc, and sending it to the corporate office.

I just can't believe I don't work there anymore. After 14 years of being so actively involved through mergers and product launches, when I see the commercials on TV now, I just can't process that it's not my company anymore. It really makes me sad. I feel so rejected and brushed under the rug. I was kind of proud of my job and my tenure there.

*sigh*

I really feel like crap.

Oh well....

I have an appointment with my hair stylist today. I have dentist and eye doctor appointments this week, and an appointment with my regular doctor later this month. Seeing all the docs now in case I end up without a job and no insurance benefits.



I also have an appointment with the church event coordinator on Thursday. I'm excited about this appointment. This is where I really get to make some plans.





My trip to Washington to see the Captain next week had to be canceled due to my work requiring me to be chained to my computer for another week of certification training. And now is not the time for me to be anything less than totally on top of my job, even if it IS Valentines. So it's postponed. The Captain is in the middle of some upgrades with his house, so as soon as it's listed and ready to sell, he said he'll come here to me. I'm not happy about this. It's really kind of depressing. I don't want to get sappy, but I miss him. I need to see him. I'm like a love sick puppy, moping around the house and whining.



On the flip side, only a select few of us are being certified in this new program at work, so maybe that's good news for my job. No promises from anyone, though.




I think I might go visit the guys at my sales office after my hair salon today. See if any of them still have a job. Then maybe I'll go shopping. I feel like buying something totally girly and unnecessary. Sometimes I wish I wasn't so responsible and cautious, because I'd love to just go out and spend an unholy amount of money right now.

All You Need is Love

This is the week that I'm chained to my desk for 40 hours of training via the internet. By the time I'm finished at 6 or so each evening, I can't bear to look at a computer screen any longer, not even for fun.

Also... my company is one of the corporations that announced doomsday layoffs this week. 8000 jobs gone. I'm pretty sure my luck has run out. I can see my position being considered a luxury and not a necessity. My team of 100 people is projected to be cut by 35.

The severance package is good, and I'm sure I'll be all right if I don't make the cut. I have strong family ties, the Captain, and a support system, so I won't be on the street. There are so many people that will be worse off. I can't help but think of several of my co-workers and friends that have children and aren't as fortunate to have close-knit families like mine. I am scared for them. I am scared for their children.

But still, I do need my job, and there aren't jobs like mine to be found in Mississippi very often. Hello, Miss Laid Off and Over Qualified.

And hearing about this worthless, so-called stimulus package on the news makes me want to kick the TV in. It's not going to do a thing but spend an unbelievable amount of taxpayer dollars, fund birth control for deadbeats, give Acorn more money to stuff ballot boxes with, help Obama pay back his campaign favors from crooked politicians, and put the United States even further in debt and trouble.

On the bright side of my world, the church is now reserved and the date is official. October 17th I'll be a bride. I might be a worthless and jobless bride, but I'll be a bride. And that sends me off to sleep with a smile. I'm a very lucky girl :-)